stand-up-comic-gifs:

Like fiery eyeball thing, no problem. But don’t even try to imagine a Samoan elf. (x)

allteensrelate:

having self confidence issues likeimage

girllookitthatbody-ahh:

I hate when people mention someone in their life by their name without providing me with any context about who this person is.

“So Dylan and I went to yoga class yesterday — ”

Hold it right there. Who the fuck is Dylan. Your boyfriend? Your arch nemesis? Your brother? Your pet sea monkey? Your therapist? Your favourite fictional character? Are you on a first-name basis with your dad? Last-name basis with Bob? WHO THE FUCK IS DYLAN.

renfamous:

British Kitchen Nightmares: “The risotto is overcooked and your restaurant needs new lighting.”

American Kitchen Nightmares: “YOUR STAFF DOES DRUGS ON THE CLOCK, YOUR FAMILY THINKS YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE AND THERE’S A LIVE RAT IN MY FOOD.”

baby-chinchilla:

Omg

trainhardbestrong:

hannahroad:

hannahroad:

hannahroad:

Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”

my uncle: “that’s great”

Miley: “it’s a bird”

my uncle: “no its not”

-chirping noise-

image

They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.

update:

she caught another bird.

image

update: she caught a squirrel today

image

She is gonna rule the world one day with this power

photographerpunzie:

Just got this gem from my brother’s girlfriend

octupac:

yeah but how many notes did ur post get in dog notes

(Source: ouijasquiji)

misscrayfish313:

magicaltypeyoswin:

kingcroacus:

fingers are weird??? like…… our arms just split into other smaller arms…………. ok

image

whAT THE HELL DID YOU DO

saccharinesinger:

kansass:

starships were meant to fly

hands up and imagine how is touch the sky

Lets do this one last time

Don’t dead open inside

snorlaxatives:

I WOKE UP WITH A SORE THROAT SOMEONE SEND HELP THIS SUCKS

teamgif:

andrvw:

teamgif:

andrvw:

people who drink the left over milk in their cereal bowls are SICK FUCKS

I DONT KNOW WHERE YOU ARE FROM BUT HERE IN MELBOURNE WE DONT WASTE MILK GOD DAMN IT I AM SO MAD THAT SHIT EXPENSIVE 

is your caps lock broken or are you really this passionate about milk

milk is the only thing i have left

how to pick up girls

braig:

if she asks you what your favorite meme is tell her it’s her

literaryvariation:

werethatgeneration:

We’re the generation of women who will teach their sons to act respectfully instead of teaching our daughters to beware

This is everything I stand for.